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Understanding and Raising an Aggressive or Active Boy

By Nigel Boys

According to Michael Thompson, co-author of “Raising Cain,” it’s perfectly normal for young boys to be running around the house, pretending to be fighting wars against imaginary foes while their sisters are happily playing quietly. He adds that it doesn’t mean that the boys will grow up to be violent individuals, as some parents might assume.

Thompson goes on to say that there are different types of boys’ behavior but most are perfectly normal. Some are happy to play when they are allowed, but will sit still when they are told and others don’t seem to be able to stop their continual motion.

The author continues that some mothers are worried about their child’s hyperactive behavior, but it doesn’t mean that they will necessarily have problems with this type of child down the line.

In a recent study, even Harvard University agreed that by the time they reach school age, the average boy, is more active than his female counterpart, even if the girl is more active than usual.

Thompson continues that not all boys are the same and parents should not try too hard to read into their young child’s behavior. He adds that some boys just like to sit quietly and read, while others want to actively explore their domain or compete in sports, but whatever their preference, parents shouldn’t be too concerned because it’s perfectly normal behavior.

The reason some boys seem to be rougher when playing with their friends than others, is that violence is in our human nature, according to Thompson. He adds that every human being has the capacity to defend themselves against others if they feel that they are being threatened.

As to why some boys are rougher than others, the author believes that it is the nature of some boys to be competitive, or then again, they might just be releasing some kind of frustration, which is temporary. He adds that the only time aggressive behavior becomes a problem, is when it’s continuous.

In conclusion, Thompson believes that you should let your boys act out their aggressive nature by letting them play competitive games with each other, providing no-one is being hurt. He adds that for young boys to fantasize about killing the bad guys doesn’t necessarily mean that they will grow up to be violent adults.

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